1. whatever you do, don’t just show up at their house…they run around in their underwear just like we do.

2. don’t cheat on them. it may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. trust me, they will find out and you will be mud.

3. beware of every single male relative and all guy friends. any of them would kick your ass at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn’t even wait for the damn hat.

4. never miss an opportunity to tell them they’re beautiful.

5. don’t refuse to kiss in front of your friends. if they laugh at you, it’s because they’re jealous.

6. if they slap you hard, you deserved it.

7. don’t be afraid to touch them if you want to. if they’re going out with you in the first place, it’s because they like being in your arms.

8. if you don’t sleep with them, do not tell your friends that you did. 8.5 if you do sleep with them, don’t tell your friends that you did.

9. you can be dirty minded in private, really…most of them are not offended by it…

10. not all of them eat like birds, a lot of them can eat like whales.

11. most of them don’t mind paying half of everything, but they do discuss these things with their friends. realize that if you make your girlfriend pay half all the time, everyone will know about it and your friends will know you’re a pussy..do you honestly need all your money that much? be a man, pay all the time!

12. every girl should eventually get three things from her boyfriend- a stuffed animal, one of his sweatshirts, and a really pretty ring. even if it’s not a serious relationship.

13. make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. if you’re dropping her off, walk her to the door. if you aren’t dropping her off, call to be sure she’s home safely.

14. if a guy is bothering her, it is your right to beat the shit out of him.

15. if you’re talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer.

16. never, ever slap her, even if it’s just in a joking way. even if she swats you first, and says, “oh, you’re so dumb” or something, never make any gestures back.

17. go to a chick flick once in a while. she doesn’t care whether you enjoy it or not, it just matters that you went.

18. you’re dead meat if you can’t get along with their pets, parents, and best friends. be prince charming to their friends, mr. polite to their parents, and make sure to be nice to their animals.

19. don’t flirt with their moms…that’s just freaky.

20. don’t be freaked out by pms. it’s not gross, and it really does make them feel like shit, so be understanding.

21. if you don’t like the way they drive, you do it.

22. if you’re officially dating, and you’re introducing her to your friends, you’d better damn well introduce her as your girlfriend.

23. don’t stress where you go for every date. they really only want to be with you.

24. if they complain that something hurts, rub it for them without being asked.

25. girls are fragile. even if you’re play fighting/wrestling, be very gentle.

26. memorize their god damn birthdays. you forget her birthday and you’re basically screwed for life.

27. don’t marinade the cologne, but smell good.

28. don’t give her something stupid for her birthday or christmas or valentine’s day. it doesn’t have to be expensive, but it has to be meaningful. jewelry is always nice.

29. if you think the relationship isn’t going to last, don’t wait to find out. it will only hurt you more if you draw it out.

30. after you’ve been dating for a while, realize that they really have started to trust you. when you have a girlfriend who truly trusts you, you have a lot more responsibility, privilege and control than you would think. be careful with it, most guys would kill for that kind of power, and it can be lost in a nanosecond.

This guy knows his shit.

1) You're still keeping the remnants of your past relationship

While a clean break -- including trashing all the stuffs that remind you about him -- shortens 'breakup misery', it seems that not many of us follow this rule. We're not talking about Swarovski necklace or Cartier watch here. But if you still haven't boxed up the little trinkets, love letters and teddy bears your ex gave you, chances are you're still holding onto the past.

2) His/Her SMSes are still on your phone

If your cellphone is still full of his/her photos and lovey-dovey texts, it will be virtually impossible to move on and you could be mired with months of perpetuated angst. Think about it this way: these mementos will only make you think what your ex is doing and realise that you're no longer privy to that information. So, erase these digital reminders and see how he starts receding from the forefront of your mind.

3) You fantasize about your ex

Having fantasies about how your relationship with your ex could have been would not help in the process of letting go. We know that it's difficult to get past those feelings, especially when you're fixated on your ex. But remember that breakup happens for a reason.

4) His/Her new relationship freaks you out

Are you wallowing in self-pity when you hear on the grapevine about your ex's new love interest? If learning about his/her new relationship difficult, it means that you're still in your healing phase. Instead, focus on living the best life possible. When split is inevitable, you're actually better off without him/her

5) You harbour the hopes that you two can still have a future together

After such a jarring change in your life, we know the pain can be unbearable. If you're still pinning for your ex who has already moved on to another relationship, it may be more about soothing a bruised ego.

6) You feel that there are things left unsaid with your ex

Do you keep a running list of things you need to tell your ex when you see him/her? Then stop dwelling on the past and move on. When the relationship is over, there's nothing left unresolved already -- especially when your ex has a new love interest. As the old adage goes: out of sight, out of mind. So, it's best to start over with a clean slate after calling it quits with your ex.

7) You're not open to new relationships

If you are constantly thinking about your ex, even when you're hanging out with your friends at the bar, you're closing every possibility of dating someone better -- your potential new partner. Or if you're not getting all excited and nervous about the popular hottie who just approached you for a number, it's highly likely that you're letting the history to take the precedence over the right now.

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* Breakup can be excruciatingly painful. Let's face it -- we've all been there. Some relationships end with fighting. Some end with crying while some with verbal insults. Whichever the case, the split is like your heart being crushed with a mullet. Sure, wallowing can assuage the pain but how long are you going to be stuck feeling unmoored upon breaking up?

If the signs that follow seem familiar, we advise you to move on and get yourself a virtual makeover that will take you from doom and gloom to va va voom in no time!